Questions from Surveys -PVCC-MCC-Premier High School

Our sincerest apologies that we are just now answering some questions from the surveys. The good news is that we have been so busy with presentations and exhibit tables we have had to table answering questions until now. So Thank You for your patience and understanding....

So lets get on with the questions:

How long did it take you to get the law passed? The passing of Kaity's Law was a team effort started by the Arizona Coalition Against Domestic Violence (AZCADV) and former Senator Jonathan Paton. Bobbi Sudberry, on a personal level, was brought in to share Kaity's Story in an effort to help the committee realize the need for such a law due to the tragedy her family faced. The AZCADV had tried for a few years to get this law passed.

If a bill is not met with opposition and passes through both parties it is a matter of months. Unfortunately, this law met with opposition and it took years and the loss of a beautiful life to get it passed.

When will your next presentation be? We schedule presentations all the time at various venues around the state. Some are open to the public. We are hoping to work with certain businesses this next year to provide presentations to the general public. We will be sure to mention when a presentation is open to the public on our Current Events page. Please check our website www.kaitysway.org/events for a current listing of scheduled presentations.

How did you move on from this? I am not so sure that we have moved on from the loss of Kaity, but we have come to terms with our loss. Creating Kaity's Way in her honor has helped with this. We also have a certain belief and faith that allows us some peace of mind.

Do you still have any resentment towards Daniel? No, he was forgiven long ago. Anger and resentment is exhausting and robs a person of too much energy. Instead we put all our energy into something good, Kaity's Way!

Faith House Visit

On September 13, 2011 Kaity's Way visited Faith House once again to share Kaity's Story with the residents. This was an adult group of women that have exited an abusive relationship and are doing what they can to get their lives back on track for them and their children. Keep on steppin ladies because your are going to make it! Kudo's to you for making that difficult and all important first step to a life of No More abuse.

100% of the Faith House residents that heard Kaity's Story this time believe that it would be helpful if more adults were educated about Teen Dating Violence and believe they would recognize the signs of a violent teen dating relationship.

There was also one question..... Howe did we start your non-profit organization..... with lots of Passion and we used the Book "How to form a Non Profit Corporation" published by Nolo's.... this book is worth its weight in gold if you are wanting to start a non profit.

Peoria Accelerated HS 090611

Kaity's Way was invited back to Peoria Accelerated HS, Peoria, Az to share Kaity's Story with Ms. Lozano's Character Education class. Kaity's Story kicked off the Relationship section of the lesson plan for her class.

The students were very respectful and patient throughout the presentation. They had some good questions also. The surveys did not have any questions to answer in the blog, but we would like to share some of their intellectual comments.....

Some answers to the question, "What message(s), if any, did you receive from Kaity's Story?

"Take action before anything happens"

"To be aware of how people act while dating etc."

"It pays to just say something"

"Be careful in your relationships"

"Know the signs of abuse"

"Watch out for the red flags"

"Violence is wrong"

"Don't think you can fix everything"

Then there was this independent comment that is encouraging "Know you informed me a lot on what I didn't know"

Kudos to the students of PAHS! You get it! Soooooooooooo exercise P.E.A.C.E. in your relationships, Take Care and Be Safe! Go Bulldogs!

Peoria Unified School District Counselors

A big Thank You to Genna Laird of the Peoria Unified School District for having Kaity's Way out to share Kaity's Story with several PUSD Counselors. While there were a lot of great questions asked at the end of the presentation there were a few asked on the surveys that we will try to answer below.

How did he find Kaity the day she was killed? What arrangements had been made for her to have transportation home? Kaity had a ride home from school, but when school let out her ride had a few things to take care of before they could leave. Kaity decided to walk on home. Best that we can put together is he was waiting for her at a house right across the street from our home.

Was any attempt made to talk to his mother? did you ever contact his parents? We did not make any attempt to speak with his family. We are not sure if law enforcement or if the school had either.

When it happened at school, How did security or administration respond? If you are asking about the two times he assaulted her at school, our understanding is that school personnel, after Kaity had gone to the office to report the incidents, found him and took him to the office. They then contacted law enforcement each time and implemented a 5 day suspension after the first incident and expelled him after the second incident.

What protections are there under the law involving telephone harassment? The statute with regards to harassment including cyber is 13-2921. What is done when law enforcement is called out varies based on the situation.

Questions from CASA of Cochise County Presentation.....

Thank you CASA of Cochise county for allowing us to share Kaity's Story.....

There was a question during the presentation that I needed to look into. That question had to do with Kaity's Law. If a juvenile is convicted for a 3rd time and it is a felony, does it go away once they turn 18 years old? I checked with the Arizona Coalition of Domestic Violence on this and the answer is as follows:
It would all depend on if the individual was charged the three times as a juvenile or an adult on any of the previous or 3rd (or subsequent charge). If the individual was charged as an adult, those would not be expunged from their record. Only crimes charged in juvenile court have the ability of being “sealed or expunged” from his record. If you are a minor (in AZ any person over the age of 8 can be charged as an adult) and charged as an adult then it will stay on the record.

What should I do if I'm the victim, but I have a child with the person? Seek help from your local resources, such as Victim Witness the number to the Cochise County office is (520) 432 8700. You can also look into Domestic Violence Counseling. In Sierra Vista you would call (520) 458 3932.

Usually when the person threatens to kill themselves it doesn't happen, Why did it happen now? Only Daniel can answer that

How does any organization go about setting up a training in Cochise County - Benson High School? If you would like Kaity's Way involved it only requires a phone call or email. We can be contacted at (602) 740 2734 or kw08@kaitysway.org. Otherwise, you could probably find some great information on line or contact CASA of Cochise county to find out how they organized their presentation.

How would you help a child of your own that is angry and have exhausted all known avenues? This is a difficult question to answer without knowing what avenues have been exhausted.

Was their relationship sexual or did it include sexual behaviors? Yes

Where did Daniel get the gun? We are not sure where Daniel got the shotgun, but we were told that he had access to guns.

Questions from Desert Shadows Middle School Nogales Az

Earlier this month, May 6th.... Bobbi Sudberry shared Kaity's Story with 330 students of Desert Shadows Middle School of Nogales Arizona. It was the students of Ms. Coopers class that arranged for this presentation to take place for their fellow students. Judge Maley works with these students and supported the effort on various levels. Hats off to the students of Ms. Coopers class, Ms. Cooper, Judge Maley and Principal Joan Molera for addressing a prevalent issue in a proactive way.

Several of the students had questions they had asked on the survey they filled out. Below are the questions and the answers.

Why did he kill her? This is a question that only Daniel can answer

How can someone cope with the loss of a daughter? It is not easy. There were times when I just wanted to literally curl up and die. Also, for a long time it felt like a really bad nightmare that you can’t seem to wake up from. Believe it or not Kaity’s Way is helpful in dealing with the loss. It is very therapeutic for me to be able to talk about her.

If you could go back to the day of her murder, what would you change? I would erase the day if I could, but my first thought is that I would have sent Kaity far far away to New Hampshire.

How is your family doing with Kaity's loss? We are coping one day at a time and are doing as well as anyone could expect. We are all dealing with it in our own way. This is one void that can never be filled.

What did she like to do most? She like to do many things, it is hard to say what she enjoyed the most as I believe she enjoyed things to the fullest.

How did the family of Daniel deal with issue of his relationship with Kaity? We do not know

Why did Kaity get from school early, the day she was killed? She only had 3 classes, so she got out of school daily at noon.

What questions did the detectives ask you? I do not recall the exact answers, but I do recall explaining the situation between Kaity and Daniel to them. I also believe they asked me what time she was due home.

Is Kaity's Law a State law only? Yes, Kaity's Law is specific to Arizona only, but there are 43 other states in the union that have similar laws. To see what the laws are in the other states you can go to http://www.breakthecycle.org/content/teen-dating-violence-state-law-report-cards.

Where did Kaity and Daniel meet? In school

Where was she shot? in our neighbors yard

What happened to the guy after she died? He committed suicide

I'm in my first relationship and I want to know what can I do as soon as I see change in my partner? First realize that you are not responsible or to blame for any ones behavior. Also, know that you deserve to always be treated with respect. Try to speak with an adult about your concerns. That could be a parent, aunt, uncle, older sibling, cousin, counselor, teacher, coach, religious leader. They should be able to point you in the right direction. There is also information on our website www.kaitysway.org and links to other resources that you can look into to get help.

Why didn't the cops do anything? I do not know and would rather not speculate or assume anything.

Why didn't she leave him at the beginning? Because he was not being mean to her. He was being very nice and eventually she fell in love with him.

What would have done if she didn't die? We would have been very Thankful.

Where do we live? Northwest part of Phoenix Arizona

What happened to Daniels mom? No idea...

How did he kill her? With a shot gun

Peoria Accelerated High School Presentation

On May 5th, Bobbi Sudberry from Kaity's Way had the pleasure of sharing Kaity's Story with the students of Peoria Accelerated High School. 17 of the 20 students completed a survey and the results are:

100% of the students believe they would recognized the warning sings of abuse in a relationship since hearing Kaity's Story.

82% believe they have known or know someone in an abusive relationship

18% believe they are in an abusive relationship

100% believe it would benefit teenagers to have Kaity's Story presented in the school systems and/or with youth organizations

Who would they go to if they found themselves in an abusive relationship?
Parents 53%, 5% Teacher/Coach, 59% Friend, 12% Counselor, 0% Religious leader, 18% Other

88% believe it would be helpful for teenagers if more adults were educated about teen dating violence

100% believe Kaity's Story was appropriate considering the subject matter

88% would share Kaity's Story with someone they believe might be in an abusive relationship.

Kudos to Ms. Lozano for providing these students with the necessary tools to identify an abusive/violent relationship as well as what as help them understand what goes into having a Healthy Relationship.....

There was one question and that was "how old was she?" She was 17 years old....